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Post by Accalia McKillen on Jan 7, 2006 23:12:09 GMT -5
"He sounds overprotective."
"Not of me." she replied bitterly. "Of my poor dear sister Faith who is being corrupted by watching me. He's so full of bullshit. Such a stupid jerk." she added angrily. How much more could she take before she went into the kitchen and grabbed a butcher knife and stabbed him with it. Then no one would ever know. There are tons of people in that house, it could've been any of them. She pictured the scene and smiled slightly. Yes, maybe she was going insane. That was alright. As long as he was murdered. Brutally, painfully. She didn't want any cheap ass stuff where you die instantly. She wanted him to fell agony. To make it completely worth it. She stared at the snow on the ground as if replaying the scene. She thought of lots of blood. SHe's seen her share of blood already. She thought back to when she met Seth. She thought back to when she'd been pushed sideways into a rigid wall and scraped pretty badly. She thought back to being beaten. Blood spill from anywhere. Bruises which she just a bunch of blood vessels burst together and stuck in one area. She hated thoughts. She wished she couldnt' remember anything.
She stared at her arm. Currently covered by her jacket and white as can be, she was never very tan in the winter, but thought about it had been before, completely black and blue and purple and brown and any other combination of disgusting colors to make one huge ass bruise. She had almost broken her arm being thrown on top of it twice in one day. She felt stupid. IT went on for so long and she didn't tell anyone. Who could she tell really? Her older sister had tried sympathy when she finally found out, but she hated the pity party. Her stupid brother told her it was her own fucking fault. Yeah, what a great over protective brother. If she had told him he probably would've went up to Jonathan and told him to hit her harder, teach her a lesson. She scowelled at the thought, narrowing her eyes and glaring at the snow below her.
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Post by Seth Lestrange on Jan 8, 2006 21:51:44 GMT -5
What Accalia said next caught Seth by surprise, he didn't expect her to reply in the way that she did. He had been waiting for her to agree with him or tell him that overprotective was an understatement of the topic. What happened next was neither, instead Accalia told him that her brother wasn't overprotective at all. By what she had been telling him before he had been nearly convinced of it, but now it seemed like she hadn't told him the whole story. There had to be something more, either that or Seth was too high to really comprehend half the things that she was telling him. He blinked and waited to see if the world had decided to move on ahead without him, but it never happened. It was a weird feeling to know that he had just missed half of a very large conversation. She must have left something out, his thoughts circled around this statement not knowing if it was a fact or if it was false. "Are you sure that you told me the whole story?" Seth asked, he took the cigarette stub from between his lips and snubbed it out by stamping it against the frost covered bench. The end of the cigarette sizzled audibly as it hit the extreme cold temperautres of the bench. Seth blinked and gazed at it for a second as if examining it before discarding it aside through the bars at the back of the bench. His question had come from nowhere and it seemed to disappear after hanging. It hadn't hung there long enough to really make an effect on Seth, and he didn't realize how rude it might have sounded. His eyes shot towards Accalia, expecting a response, but not a quick one. He knew how damaging drugs could be when it came to reacting and responding normally when under the influence of them. Seth yawned, his breath stifling slightly due to the cold air and large quantities of smoking that he had been doing over the past couple years.
Reaching into his pocket Seth pulled out another cigarette and his cheap plastic lighter. He stuffed the cigarette into the side of his mouth and lit up expertly manuerving the lighter and shielding the flame at the same time. He replaced all the said items back into his pockets apart from the cigarette which was now emitting a fresh column of swaying smoke. The smoke coming from it curled into the cold air, it drew Seth's attention away from Accalia for a few moments before he realized that they had been talking. Another question had been forming in his mind while he had watched the smoke but it had suddenly left as quickly as it had come. Seth racked his brains looking for it, it had been a good one full of meaning too. He sighed in frustration as he took a long drag on the cigarette, blowing the smoke away from Accalia. It looked like she was deep in thought anyways, maybe she would have forgotten his first question. Maybe she hadn't even heard him, Seth wasn't known to be very loud. Most of the time his voice was quiet, but loud enough to be heard.
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Post by Accalia McKillen on Jan 9, 2006 1:10:18 GMT -5
"Are you sure that you told me the whole story?"
Accalia turned her head to look at Seth for a moment. The whole story? She could barely remember what she had said already. She tried to think back. She had majorly gone off on a tangent venting so she wasn't sure what she had thought and what she had said, nor if she'd left anything out. She stared blankly towards the sky. She tried to rewind their conversation to see what she had said, but she had no idea. She just sighed. What could she say to prove her point? She knew one thing, but it made her look stupid. She really didn't care that much what other people thought about her, so it didn't really matter now that she thought about it, she just wasn't sure. He'd probably heard some sort of version of it...well, part of it. Things always got twisted within the depths of gossip throughout the school. It was so huge that it was no wonder things got changed around constantly. The true story was never what the final story circulating was. Either someone intentionally changed it(in her case) or it was just told so many times that it got so screwed up in all of the transportation of it. She sighed, might as well. "No, theres no doubt he's a jerk." she said as a starter. He probably had no idea where she was going with this, though she, for one time in her life, actually knew somewhat of what she was gonna say. "Well, my exboyfriend and I dated for a long time and he used to beat me up daily, or whenever he was upset and whatnot, took out his problems on me, until it just became habit, but I didn't tell anyone because that would just make him even more angry and he'd probably kill me considering he'd almost done it before and basically, when someone finally caught him in the act and a bunch of people found out, my brother, Daman, told me that it was my own fault and that I was stupid." she said and shrugged. "I wasn't really expecting pity or sympathy, but that pretty much sums him up in a second." she added. She shrugged again and stared up at the sky.
She looked down at the cigarette in her hand and noticed that it had gone out already. She sighed and tossed it a ways away. She rested her arms by her side and closed her eyes. She hated memories, once again. She remembered that thought. She sighed and ran a hand through a chunk of her hair on the side of her head. What would talking help anything? It obviously had never before so why was she doing it once again. Why the hell would anyone, especially someone who was basically a stranger, want to listen to her poor sob story? She wouldn't even want to listen to it in the third person, but of course, she had memories of many things throughout her childhood and up until now and none of the really clear ones seemed to be any good, and she had too many clear ones.
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Post by Seth Lestrange on Jan 11, 2006 12:37:14 GMT -5
Seth let his head fall back as he stared blankly at the sky above. He was listening to Accalia's words, some of them seemed to make sense and sink in while others just floated near the surface of his mind in the haze that seemed to be the blue sky above his head. He could feel the Earth and it's rotations beneath his back, the slow motion in which it was moving. For a second everything and everyone seemed to come to a complete stop, even Accalia's short monologue on what had happened to her. Than everything commenced as usual except at a very slow pace. Seth blinked several times, knowing that he was letting himself get to lost within himself. Coming slowly back to reality he took a long drag on the cigarette trying to keep his attention focused on reality. He wasn't sure why what had happened had just had but he figured it might have been because Accalia had stopped talking and paused or something like that. He ignored it, it was normal. Normal for Seth at least. Seth glanced sideways at Accalia after she finished her story, some if not most of it had sunken in by now and he looked at her a little compassionately. "He sounds like a real asshole." Seth replied in the puff of smoke that had freshly surrounded his head causing the world to look even more grey and hazy. "Why didn't you get out of it when he first layed a hand on you?" Seth asked, it was his next question followed after a long delay between his first comment. His question was worded softly and it came out in a short of halting voice. Seth brushed the tuft of black hair that lay over his left eye up, before letting it fall back down to it's original place. He could feel that Accalia seemed lost in some sort of thought. His brown eyes rested on her a moment before moving restlessly back up towards the hazy blue sky.
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Post by Accalia McKillen on Jan 13, 2006 15:40:43 GMT -5
"He sounds like a real asshole."
Accalia continued with her look of disgust. "Great, you're catching on." she replied, her voice dripping with sarcasm. Words could not describe how much she hated her brother. She couldnt' even describe him. Just stories. He was worse than any possible dirty or disgusting word. He was dirt. Lower than dirt. She wished she could push him into a volcano. Or off a cliff to land in many sharp rocks. That would be nice...or something worse than that. She'd come up with something eventually. SHe was good at imagining up ways to murder people, especially ones who really needed it...like Daman. He could use a good beating. She wondered what would happen if she lit his room on fire with him inside...
"Why didn't you get out of it when he first layed a hand on you?"
Her thoughts of torture were interupted by Seth with another question for her. She thought about it for a few moments. That was a good question, and she definately did not have a good answer. "Well, I don't know. It was just something. He apologized, and seemed really sincere." she said simply and shrugged. "He promised that it was an accident and that he wouldn't do it again." she added. It was the stupidest reason ever, yes, but it was just that. "And, it was just something about it. About, being with someone. Having someone there or something. He would always listen to me and help me think up ways to murder my dear brother. We just...had a connection." she explained. "I'm not sure if it was real or if it was all lies, but it was a good feeling that I had." she answered. It was such a stupid response. SHe had never heard anything so stupid in her life, but it was the truth. THere had always been a thing with her. About having someone there for her, since no one ever was when she was growing up. It was just...there.
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Post by Seth Lestrange on Jan 16, 2006 12:48:26 GMT -5
[Yeah, so it's short xP ... out post me I dare you to xD]
Seth sensed that Accalia's voice was dripping with sarcasim by now, but he wasn't quick to understand it. The drugs were making him slow, slower than usual at least. He saw that she seemed to be stuck deep in thought again, and it wasn't the first time today. Seth remained quiet and let Accalia think for a while, letting his second question remain suspended above the conversation. He looked down studying the ground near the bench that he was laying on than focusing intensely on the sky again. His mind didn't seem like it was aware of anything that was going on around him. He looked a bit out there, a dreamy expression had fallen across his face. Accalia's answer came soon enough to his second question, and when it came Seth had half-wished that he had never bothered to ask it. Her answer had somehow been weak and it didn't make much sense. Seth wasn't sure if it was the influence of drugs or if it was just the fact that Accalia might not have known how to answer it. He pushed it off and just sat there listening to it and than replaying it back in his head. It was a peculiar answer all right, he didnt' understand how she could feel safe with someone like that. He didn't want to intervene because it had dawned on him that she most likely had a different thought process than he did about these things so he let it be. Seth became quiet after that, not really replying or asking another question. He seemed to let the whole manner drop after hearing her reply. She sounded a bit confused because he had hit her with a good question and he felt a little bad about doing it. She seemed like she didn't need any more problems on her back and he didn't want to add to it.
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Post by Accalia McKillen on Jan 17, 2006 2:09:55 GMT -5
Accalia stared up at the sky. She couldn't believe she had just told her entire life story to practically a complete stranger. She had only met him one time before then and they seemed to be very hostile towards each other. She had just learned his name today so they were definately not "best friends" or whatever. Well, it wasn't technically her entire life story, though the Daman stuff was, but it was mainly a chunk of her life. A large chunk. She dated Jonathan for eight months. He was the greatest guy. Everyone loved him and he seemed like the greatest catch. For the first three months, everything was awesome. They dated and spent time together. He bought her flowers and wrote her notes and she was so happy. She didnt' think anything bad could possibly happen. The first time he hit her was so awkward. It was just a slap, but it left something. Sure, she'd seen him angry before, but he'd never gone that far. She was scared and left. The following day, he brought her a pink rose, which was her favorite flower, and told her how sorry he was. He was so sincere and just waited for her to forgive him. He watched her through the day and waited outside every single class, even when she told him that she didn't want to see him, just in case she did. She finally got back with him and he didn't do it again, for a while. When it started happening more frequently, she wasn't sure what to do. They had been together a long time and she figured he was just having a bad week. He seemed to be fine, but then it just became a habit and she was afraid to get away. After one really bad incident, he apologized 20000 times and called on her constantly and left her a bunch of messages saying how he was sorry and how he loved her. She didnt' tell anyone what had actually happened, but just that they'd gotten into an argument. She was ashamed that she was in a relationship like that, or that she'd been too blind to see it. SHe truley believed he cared about her, but that his anger was so bad and that he didnt' even try to control it, no matter who it was. She knew it wasn't just her, but his younger sister too so she was somewhat glad that it wasn't her, but felt bad that there were more people involved. She didnt' like to think about it because she really did care about him, but she wasn't exactly sure what to think. She really liked the fact that she had someone and that she could talk to him...to an extent. She was glad when she finally told her friend Katia, who rescued her. He was now in low security prison and she had a restraining order against him. All of the physical wounds had healed up nicely, though she wasn't sure if the emotional ones ever would.
She turned her head to look at Seth. He had taken in a lot of what she had said, though she kind of hoped he would forget. She wasn't exactly sure the effect of drugs versus of alcohol. Probably different. "Please don't tell anyone, okay? I mean, what I told you. I get enough stuff as it is, without everyone knowing exactly what happened, and especially about Daman." she said. She didn't want anything to happen. She knew that there was tons of gossip about her, but barely anyone really knew the true story of her and Jonathan, and she'd like to keep it that way. She definately didnt' want to deal with the pity or questions or the heavier gossip of it. That would not help her at all, and her situation was already not the best. She was already not acting like herself and more shit about her would probably just push her over the edge. ((xD))
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